Night-time musings...

Well, yah. How's everyone doing? :D


As for me...

Schoolwork never ends, and the ambitious dreams of the damned surface every night only to implode upon themselves, a million noble ships striving for individual beauty and accomplishment being crushed by the tidal wave of absurd homework.
(no really, it feels like that.)

I think it is rather my fault with regard to my ambitions, as I seem to wax strongest in desire when multitudinous opposition comes crashing into my life through the guise of academia, when the noblest endeavour is considered the least practical and is the least appreciated.
But then, when did a one ever do a noble endeavour to be appreciated?
Oh no, the appreciation is wholly in the mind of the endeavouror, he who strives for the beauty of self-actualization, he who works for the sake of the work itself, oh yes it is he and he alone who moves to convey the beauties of the world and the mysteries of the heavens, he alone who understands the beauty in creation and in understanding.

But I ponder, is it truly a fault in mine mind, in my ethic, that I should undertake so many endeavours at once as to detest the generalities and hoops through which the education systems insist I must prove my intellect? My worth?
Since when is worth a measure of measured success?
Isn't it our desires, our ambitions, our goals, and our actual un-influenced, un-perturbed, untainted works that show who we really are and what we really have to offer?
Sure, that is what the college essay is for, but the brevity of an essay with respect to the growth of an individual through his own desires and ambitions is akin to the difference between a high-school student learning chemistry and a professional chemist with a P.H.D in chemistry and a majors in biology.
The two exist on different planes, virtually incomparable except in the fact that they both are concerned with Chemistry, albeit on different levels of intense devotion and complexity.
The point here being that secondary schooling the way it is currently being done does nothing to foster the true agenda and purpose of the individuals that it is purported to help become better, well-rounded, and more intelligent people.

Forcing students to do work is psychologically foolish, as what could have been seen as a chance to take ownership of some creation and work to test their own skill and to grow as a person is now being bastardized into a stressful evaluation of their individual worth to society as a whole.
How smart are you, how well can you do what we tell you, regardless of how much work we may overassign you.

Well I can tell you one thing for sure, no matter what happens with schooling, no matter whether I do great or poorly, I know that I am capable of doing whatever I wish and I know all the realms of knowledge that intrigue me most.
I know which professions I have the most respect for, and I know which profession will be my main one, which one I shall devote all my time and precious thoughts to, all my creative energies, my everything.

Everything that prevents me from pursuing these avenues, now that is crippling beyond any damage I could do to myself.
Indeed, the testing schools do does not seem to be about making sure we learn content and solve problems, but rather seems to be about evaluating our abilities as learning machines and pushing us through to the next test to be taken.
I think it should be more focused on learning and sharing ideas and knowledge, different applications and ways of using the knowledge, and should foster creativity and ingenuity.
Ingenuity is the rarest and most precious of all the qualities that a school could foster in it's students, and it is the single quality that the school structure innately opposes.
It would be interesting to see self-motivated students come up with challenging projects that they desire to do on their own, and then to have them submit them to their professor for critique and perhaps praise as well.
The best thing you can do is practice, correct, practice, correct, discuss, discuss, theorize, practice, correct, discuss, etc...
All this test taking, all these boring assignments that do nothing to capture the power and the essence of what it means to be human and the truths of reality and humanity, is most definitely NOT the best way to prepare for our careers in the future.
It is not. It only creates stress and competition, both likely to shorten your life and cause issues in your psyche and how you view others and the world.
There is little open about the environment in which we are thrown when we go through high school, despite our rational capabilities and our relative maturity.
We are still treated like children, when many of us are itching to jump straight into learning what we need to and desire to for our professional careers.
Let's just suppose a long life is 80 years.
(As the average person lives for like 75 or something years, 80 maybe, I don't know for sure but it's around that range.)

If we consider schooling prior to college, then most people graduate highschool at age 18.
If we round up, that is 20.
20/80 is 25% of your life!
You spend a fourth of your life and you haven't spent most of it studying the core tenets of your profession.
Think about how much more we could advance if we focused more on our professions.
Of course, many people don't know what they want to be at such a young age, and I suppose that is why we don't focus on our professions.
But the moment that we know what we love and what we will become, that is the moment that all the restrictions should be lifted and we should be able to soar as high as we can and whenever we can, until we reach college and the higher fringes of achievement that our profession offers.

Well...
I have to stop here.
I know I have made a lot of claims, and have stated things that you may blatantly disagree with and outright see as misunderstanding.
But please understand that I do not intend the above to be seen as truth, nor to be seen as pure understanding.
I have not had time to analyze my thoughts and to articulate them coherently, to say what I mean accurately instead of misinterpreting my own thoughts and saying something that is absolutely ludicrous.
This body of text serves merely as a method for me to boldy state what is on my mind without any real editing or correction, for the purpose of sharing my thoughts so they aren't cluttering up my mind and so I may then analyze my thoughts to then agree with myself or disagree with myself, and then from there improve my thoughts and adapt to the proper perspective on this subject matter.

Any person who purports to know the sole truth of the matter of any topic is a person to be wary of indeed, as such a claim is both improbable and narrow-minded.
I am open to your criticisms and thoughts, as this helps me to grow and is essential for seeking the pathway to the truth of the matter.
I cannot do it alone. (most likely, and if at all never completely.)

That is all I have to say,

Sincerely,

~James Dodon